About a day ago, we had this argument with a certain friend. I recall telling him how he was selfish and so was anyone who reasoned in a similar manner. I called him selfish several times. Well, eventually he was noble enough to end the tiff by admitting that I won. For two lawyers who had plenty of time, that disagreement had ended fairly (and disappointingly) fast.
There’s also this other pal who I’d been complaining to God about their selfishness. How whenever we talked, they were more concerned about their affairs and mine were dismissed as quickly as possible so that we could get back to their own. I decided to conclude that their selfishness would end as they matured and grew in wisdom.
Then today all tables turned; suddenly I was the main culprit. God started revealing the state of my heart and my oh my, was filthy! He showed how the selfishness I was seeing in others was far smaller compared to mine. It reminded me of the argument I mentioned earlier and how I accused my friend of seeing the speck in other people’s eyes and being blind to the log in their eyes. Little did I know that it was going to be better suited to my case.
Lately God’s been laying my heart bare and so far I’ve seen excess pride, ingratitude, lust, selfishness etc. Which would mean I had become a proud, lustful, selfish ingrate!
Today while He laid my heart bare, He went a step further and broke it. I lay down prostrate and cried! Even after that repentance session, I still feel a little teary and broken but grateful for what felt like heart surgery.
Were it not for His mercies and blood, I do not know where I’d be! I’m glad He broke me to make me whole.