My Two Fish

That title right there just about summarizes my life currently. Whenever I’d read the story of the boy who gave his two loaves and five fish, I doubt I thought much about the boy. Until recently when God took it on a personal level for me.

I can imagine that small boy in the crowd of 5,000 men and more likely, countless women and children. He was more or less insignificant; a mere drop in the ocean. Children were to be seen not heard. So imagine how he felt when a disciple asked him for his fish and bread. What would his very little portion do in a crowd this big? Anyway, he still gave. You can picture the shock he was in after he found out that his contribution fed the entire mammoth crowd and was even left over.

This has been me lately and I have watched that miracle happen over and over again. I have seen God ask me to give Him my two fish, several times, and reminded me not to worry because they were now in His hands. The number of times I’ve been overwhelmed and on the verge of despair, was probably more than the times I tried to trust God.

The circumstances were evidence enough: what I had, was practically nothing and my circumstances required way beyond what I could offer. I cried enough and kept telling God how I quit. There was absolutely no way I was equipped to handle the things He brought my way.

Until He started pointing me towards small things He’d done for me, to reassure me that He was still my Father and hadn’t relinquished control over my life. Then He did a very big miracle on a certain Thursday. I was left in awe and felt foolish for spending too much time being worried. I watched my two fish go over and beyond anything I had imagined.

Then the next day, a Goliath awaited me and I figured God would slay that giant; shock on me, that giant stayed!!! I freaked out, stressed out, cried and asked a million questions. Why would God abandon me like this? Then in His usual loving way He reminded me that the He was God on Thursday and still God on that Friday. He went ahead and organised an unexpectedly wonderful time for me. He ensured I was fully relaxed and even used the person I met to emphasize some of the things He’d been telling me.

I eventually faced the giant and was taught how some giants are defeated by one action at a time. Remember that proverb on how you can’t swallow a whole elephant but you eat it piece by piece? Yeah, that is quite true. God taught me to take one day at a time and only focus on the moment. Take tiny steps of faith for each day and refuse to focus on the circumstances.

The best part was that He personally walked me through it. It’s amazing to see how God expects you to walk on water but the whole time, He’s the one who provides the faith, the grace and holds you right through it.

So, how would anything insignificant get to count in our lives? Well, I have come to learn that we should not and must not despise what we have. Take whatever that is and surrender it to God. In your hands, it is nothing but in His hands, it becomes more than enough. Choose to believe God even when it makes little or no sense. He might multiply your two fish but He can also empower you to face that giant or walk on those waters.

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4 thoughts on “My Two Fish

  1. Today I am taking a leap of faith and going to evangelise in Kilifi.Never been there but I will go,. housing seemed to stop my progress and I have to dig to the savings account where I said ‘not touching it’ Oh, how God calls and the desire is not quenched,it burns until it’s fulfilled.In Jesus name everything will be alright even if not.

    Liked by 1 person

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