Satisfying Love

I picked up a lesson that had me doing some reflection. There’s a verse every single person probably knows of by now if you’ve been anywhere around church or a christian set up or camp/seminar/conference. The one quoted in Songs of Solomon a whole 3 times: Do not awaken love until you can satisfy it.

Most times we were told this with regards to the warning that you shouldn’t awaken love until the time was right. This of course is loaded with plenty of wisdom. Starting to love when you’re not ready for the responsibilities that love holds is usually a bad idea.

However, today I focus on an angle I hadn’t seen before: satisfaction of love. I think it’s prudent to begin by understanding the definition of satisfy: To fulfill the need, desire, or expectation of.

Placed in context, the verses in Songs of Solomon simply state that you should not awaken love until you can fulfill the needs, desires and expectations of love. From this point onward, it’s only befitting that we interrogate some of those needs desires and expectations.Let’s be selfish for a minute and look at love from our point of view, and no, we’re not considering agape or philia love.

Love needs to be fed and given attention for it to grow, love needs to be requited. Love expects that if it gives, it shall receive. Love needs to feel secure for it to flourish, it wants to feel safe. It expects that the other person will have their best interests at heart. It desires to trust fully. Love desires to be exalted and feel special, not to be in competition with others. Love needs to be exclusive.

This list is not exhaustive, love has countless demands and desires based on the people involved and their needs. The point is, when you’re awakening your love, when you’re growing that crush, when you’re entertaining your feelings towards someone; are you thinking about your heart, your love? Will this person that you can’t wait to give your love to, satisfy your love?

Ask yourself these questions and more. Will they make your love feel secure? Will they give your love the exclusivity it needs? Are they too distracted to satisfy your love? Are they too broken to give your love what it needs? (It’s okay to allow broken people to heal without you giving them the pressure to meet your needs).

Of course we know love does not happen overnight and you’ll not find someone already holding everything your love needs at first sight. But, find someone who is willing to be committed to walk the journey of satisfying your love as you reciprocate the same. That genuine willingness to commit is essential.

Bottom line is, your love has needs, desires and expectations; so don’t go flinging it to every other person. Let your love rest and when it can be satisfied, then awaken it. In the mean time, feel free to enjoy and exercise agape and philia love; soak in it and spread the same.



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